An Idiot, a Fan with a Brain, and 2p England's Special Cupcakes!
by nicolft
Summary: What happens when you take someone with a brain, make them friends with an oblivious idiot, and give the idiot one of 2p!England's cupcakes? Easy: Crack! Rated T because I'm paranoid like everyone else. Enjoy! :D


**What happens when you take someone with a brain, make them friends with an oblivious idiot, and give the idiot one of 2p!England's cupcakes? Easy: Crack! 8D**

**Based off of an odd rp conversation Applechan53 and I had xD It's obvious who is who :3**

**Note: Dialogue was not altered in any way :D So excuse us if it's hard to understand or something~**

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Apple walked alongside Nicolft through a magical mansion the Hetalia characters lived in (for the fandom!). Recently, they had visited the kitchen.

"Hey...I think I may be starting to get used to 2p!Hetalia...it scares me less than it used to..." She informs with a slight smile.

A broad grin spread across Nicolft's face, "That's good! Do you want a cupcake? Oliver* made them!" She seemed to pull a cupcake out of thin air and shoved it in her face. A light, slightly vanilla flavor cupcake with rainbow frosting nearly collided with her face and obscured her sight, courtesy of Nicolft.

"...I'll pass, thank you..." Apple refused the offer, pushing the cupcake away.

Nicolft immediately gave her puppy-dog eyes, disheartened by the rejection, "B-But he only put poison in _half_ of the cupcakes!"

Apple groaned, facepalming, then proceeded to smack Nicolft's head, "THAT DOESN'T MAKE THEM OKAY TO EAT!"

"I DON'T UNDERSTAND!" Nicolft bawled, gingerly rubbing a fresh bump on her head.

Apple swore that Nicolft was the most idiotic person on the Earth, "IF HE ONLY POISONED _HALF_ THE CUPCAKES, THAT MEANS THERE'S A 50% CHANCE _YOU'LL DIE!_" She took a deep breath, "THAT'S NOT WORTH A CUPCAKE YOU FOOL!"

"But," Nicolft frowned, "surely for a _cupcake!_"

Apple sighed, "Nope. Not worth it."

Nicolft looked close to tears, "B-B-But-"

"-IT'S NOT WORTH IT, YOU HEAR ME?!" Apple screeched anger washing over her, "NOW GO THROW THESE AWAY RIGHT NOW BEFORE I TAKE THEM AND FEED THEM ALL TO...YOUR PET!"**

"Ah, I don't have a pet because we just don't have fish anymore and my brother is apparently allergic to cats," She frowned for a brief second before perking up, "BUT I'LL TAKE 'EM!"

Apple nodded understandingly and put a hand on Nicolft's shoulder, "I'm allergic to cats...it's awfu-" She paused, realization dawning on her, "WAIT, NO! GIMME THOSE!" She ordered, snatching the cupcakes out of Nicolft's hands, "I'M THROWING THESE AWAY!" She announced, then stormed off.

"WAAH!" Nicolft rushed after her and plunged her hand into a cupcake, digging some of the rainbow-vanilla goodness out and shoving it in her mouth, "IT TASTES SO _YUMMMYYYYYY!_"

Apple quickly slapped the remaining amount of cupcake out of Nicolft's hand and roared, "DON'T SWALLOW THAT!"

It wasn't a surprise when Nicolft ignored her command.

Instead, she savored the delicious cupcake, foam cascading down onto the carpet when she opened her mouth to speak, "...It tastes like rainbows!"

Meanwhile, Apple was pulling her hair out and slowly becoming hysterical, "WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?! I-I'M GONNA GO GET OLIVER! H-HE'LL GIVE ME THE ANTIDOTE!" She started running off, "IF NOT, I _WILL NOT_ HESITATE TO KILL HIM!"

Apple did not notice that she'd thrown many of the remaining cupcakes into the air when she ran away. Nicolft took this opportunity to catch five of them and stuff them into her mouth, "YOU LEFT SOME CUPCAKES BEHIND!" She called to her, and quickly scarfed down the cupcakes (and maybe some foam) and licked all the frosting (and foam) from around her mouth, "Mmmmph!"

Apple stopped her retreat and whipped around at that statement to stare at Nicolft in horror. Then she turned back around, took a deep breath, and shrieked at the top of her lungs, "...**_.OLIVER!_**"

Nicolft had started advancing towards the enraged Apple and promptly collapsed on her, rubbing all the froth accumulated at Nicolft's mouth on Apple.

The unsuspecting Apple heard Nicolft say something about a last nom, and offered one last cupcake with a sigh. Being the sane person she is, Apple didn't expect Nicolft to lift her head up and start chewing on her shoulder.

"Mmm..._NOM!_"***

Apple screamed, a combination of pure rage, terror, and disbelief, "OLIVER YOU GET YOUR BUTT OVER HERE RIGHT NOW BEFORE I TAKE ONE OF THESE CUPCAKES AND SHOVE IT DOWN YOUR THROAT WHOLE!"

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*** - Oliver is 2p!England's name!...In ****_my_**** book, at least...  
** - Originally she said, "-insert pet's name here-", but that wouldn't really work...  
*** - In other conversations, I had nommed Belarus twice, then America! Now it was Apple's turn. :3**

**Yay! Please rate and review and all that stuff and stuff! It makes me happy :D If you do, I'LL GIVE YOU A ****_CUPCAKE!_**** Then you can enjoy a wonderful treasure for life.**


End file.
